Is Your Marriage BROKEN?

Is Your Marriage BROKEN?.

Is Your Marriage BROKEN?

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You can’t blame him for seeking out his old flame on facebook.  You can’t blame her for reconnecting with her college sweetheart.  You can’t blame a husband OR a wife for having a hot and steamy adulterous affair…at least not in the State of Florida, since Florida, legally speaking, is a no fault state.  What you can do is: 1) realize the marriage is broken;  2) live with it;  3)  fix it; or 4) divorce and move on. 

Infidelity takes many forms:  sexual, emotional, and financial.  Or any combination thereof.  What kind of infidelity are you sleeping with?  Whatever the case, only you can decide if it is worth trying to fix.  Even the best intentions are thwarted, sometimes when he won’t give her up…she won’t stop spending…they are room mates of convenience. 

If communication won’t break the ice resulting in fruitful discussions, maybe then marriage counseling will help.  You both have to want to go.  If that is not possible, or you tried and it isn’t working, then be smart about your bad fortune and seek legal advice before you lose the chance to protect yourself from the inevitable.  A break in the marriage may seem like the end, but in reality, it is just the beginning of a long a stressful process called divorce.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information. 

 

Behaviors That Can Lead To Divorce Court

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida As a divorce lawyer, I see the bad in very good people.  Over the years, I have noticed some recurring themes in my clients or their spouses, that lead me to understand why the marriage failed.  Here are some of the more obvious behaviors that lead couples to divorce:

1.  Disrespect.  When the respect for each other is gone, the marriage cannot be saved.

2.  Unmet needs.  If the spouses “grow apart” leaving each with unmet needs, what more is there to hold onto.

3.  Being critical, judgmental.  These are personal attacks upon someone you are supposed to be in love with.

4.   Being in love with someone else.  This one is obvious.

5.  Blaming without taking responsibility.  A marriage does not fail because of just one side.

If you recognize yourself or or spouse in any of these examples, either get to a marriage counselor, or get to a divorce lawyer.  For more information about the divorce process, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.

What Are The Two Types Of Divorces?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

As a divorce lawyer, I see two types of divorces out there…the legal one and the emotional one.  Often we divorce lawyers get the legal divorce resolved for our clients, but the now former wife and former husband fail to get an emotional divorce.

This often happens when there is a co dependency relationship.  Even though the former husband and former wife have moved on, legally speaking, there is still the anger, resentment, frustration and the intent to get even.  This can cause ongoing litigation in terms of modifications of alimony and child support, disputes over the kids clothing, costs, and time sharing, and contempt of court for not doing what the court order states just to be difficult.

That is why I often suggest my clients seek counseling.  It is a good idea to have professional help to get you to make the decision to divorce; to assist you with getting through the divorce process, and ultimately to achieve that all important emotional divorce so you can move on with your life.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com for more information. 

Use A Shrink To Tell Your Spouse You Want A Divorce

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

In the state of Florida, you do not need “permission” from your spouse to be granted a divorce, even if your spouse does not want the divorce.  What you will need, however, is a way to express to your spouse that the marriage is over and you want out.

I often recommend to clients in my practice, to engage the help of a professional for this purpose of telling your spouse you want a divorce.  First, many couples are already seeing a marriage counselor or therapist.  It is easier to come to the divorce conclusion if you are already discussing your relationship with this counselor.  Using a therapist or marriage counselor or even clergy or other professional at the time, is helpful.  Inform your spouse of your final decision and discuss it right then and there with a third party present.

On the other end of the spectrum is simply to move out of the marital home the same day you have your spouse served with divorce papers.   If there is a history of domestic violence in the home, this is the way to go.  Do not be around, when your spouse gets those divorce papers.

In the middle ground, is to use a therapist to negotiate the divorce process.  Sometimes therapists and marriage counselors can keep the divorce amicable, thus avoiding nasty litigation and all that goes along with that.  I highly recommend bringing therapists into the divorce process to keep the peace.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

 

I Filed For Divorce In Anger…Can I Change My Mind?

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

When people are having marital problems and stress, they lash out in anger and sometimes do things without thinking it through.  Such was the case of a husband who had just had it with his wife’s spending habits.  He broke down and filed for divorce.  The significant thing about that was the filing date is generally thought of as a cut off date for marital debt.  In other words, anything the wife spent after the date of filing for divorce, would ultimately remain her debt.

The problem was that this Husband had buyer’s remorse.  After filing for divorce, he realized he still loved his wife and was sorry he reacted so extremely.  Now he wanted to stop the divorce process and get his shopaholic wife some counseling.

This can be done in two ways: either a voluntary dismissal of the entire divorce case, or an abatement for three months, to give the parties time to either reconcile, or go to marriage counseling to determine if they will go forward with the divorce or dismiss it.

The moral of the story is, yes, you can stop a divorce if you want to, but you run the risk of the other party taking up the divorce and running with it.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.

 

 

Holidays Can Be Difficult Days For Those In Troubled Marriage

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

It is no surprise that along with the holidays comes the stresses of the season.  It is a well known fact that people stress out over the holidays.  It is especially hard for couples who have failing marriages, couples who are trying to stay together for the sake of the kids, couples who just hopelessly don’t know what to do.

Husbands and wives who have already moved out and on mentally, especially have a hard time keeping it together at this time of year.  How do you pretend?  How do you stay pleasant?  How do you keep from blowing up?  Psychological counseling or marriage counseling is one answer.  A consultation with a divorce lawyer is another.  It may put your mind at ease and give you a plan to keep you from unraveling.   If you know your rights in divorce court, you may be able to make better choices during the season’s festivities.  For more information call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

Do You Have A Spiteful, Vindictive Spouse???

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You are going through a divorce.  You are the one who wants out.  You have a spouse who it hurt, and as a result is spiteful and vindictive.  You want to settle the divorce issues and move on, but he/she is more interested in getting even.  What to do?

I face this question nearly every day in the 13 years I have been a divorce lawyer in Palm Beach County.   You have few options:

1.  Get into marriage counseling or therapy together immediately.

2.  Offer much more than his/her share of the marital estate to get the deal done.

3.  Meet any other demands, such as relocation, giving the marital home, or other “unfair” requirements just to move on.

4.  Stay and fight it out in court.  A judge will see the emotion at trial and will simply follow the law.

With spiteful, vindictive spouses, chances are there will be domestic violence or destruction of personal property.  Be sure to protect yourself from both situations.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.