One Spouse Wants Divorce, Other Does Not…

One Spouse Wants Divorce, Other Does Not….


Use A Shrink To Tell Your Spouse You Want A Divorce

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

In the state of Florida, you do not need “permission” from your spouse to be granted a divorce, even if your spouse does not want the divorce.  What you will need, however, is a way to express to your spouse that the marriage is over and you want out.

I often recommend to clients in my practice, to engage the help of a professional for this purpose of telling your spouse you want a divorce.  First, many couples are already seeing a marriage counselor or therapist.  It is easier to come to the divorce conclusion if you are already discussing your relationship with this counselor.  Using a therapist or marriage counselor or even clergy or other professional at the time, is helpful.  Inform your spouse of your final decision and discuss it right then and there with a third party present.

On the other end of the spectrum is simply to move out of the marital home the same day you have your spouse served with divorce papers.   If there is a history of domestic violence in the home, this is the way to go.  Do not be around, when your spouse gets those divorce papers.

In the middle ground, is to use a therapist to negotiate the divorce process.  Sometimes therapists and marriage counselors can keep the divorce amicable, thus avoiding nasty litigation and all that goes along with that.  I highly recommend bringing therapists into the divorce process to keep the peace.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at for more information.


Can A Judge Deny A Divorce?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You have filled out all the papers, taken hours to compile documents, and now you want to go get divorced.  Can a judge deny the divorce?  The answer is yes.

The first reason is improper notice to your spouse.  If your spouse was not properly served with divorce papers, or had not signed a waiver of service of process, then the divorce will be denied for improper notice to your spouse.

If there is a child involved in the break up of the marriage, and the child support obligations are not within the statutory guideline amount, the judge can deny the divorce.

If there is no parenting plan for time sharing, the judge will deny the divorce.

If there are no financial affidavits in the court file, and proper exchange of financial documents called mandatory disclosure  has not been done, the judge can deny the divorce.

If the parenting class has not been completed by both parties, the judge can deny the divorce.

There are a host of other reasons why a judge can deny the divorce.  However, the denial is “without prejudice” which means that the reasons for denying the divorce can be fixed and the parties can come back to court once that is accomplished.  

If you are planning to get divorced in Palm Beach County, Florida, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 for more information or click on the Firm’s web site at for more information.

Amicable Divorce and Avoiding the Embarassment of Service of Process

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You and your spouse have decided for whatever reason to separate and get a divorce.  You have children, and don’t want to spend a fortune on attorneys fees.  You agree to agree to the terms of your divorce.

However, without proper  notice to the other spouse, the spouse petitioning the court for a divorce cannot get a divorce.  There are two ways to achieve proper notice and preservation of due process rights.

The first is the traditional way, of having a process server knock on the door of the home or office of your spouse and formally serve divorce papers.  This can cause some embarrassment, gossip, or worse, job loss.

The second way is to agree with your spouse to accept divorce papers by waiver of service of process.  If you sign a court document called a waiver, and the papers are mailed to you or delivered by hand by the spouse, this constitutes due process since you are already in agreement to accept divorce papers this way.   The important thing is you have proper notice that you are being sued for divorce.  It just takes the nastiness out of the equation.  This leaves better opportunity for settlement and peace of mind.

For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at

Should you avoid service of divorce papers?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

Your marriage is falling apart.  Your spouse has told you he/she has consulted a divorce lawyer.  You know it is just a matter of time.  Should you avoid service of the divorce papers?

In the state of Florida, if one party wants a divorce, then a divorce is imminent.  The matter of due process arises, because the other party needs to be put officially “on notice” of the proceeding against you.  That is why you often hear the words “sue for divorce”.  It is, in fact, a lawsuit.

The general rule is to make yourself available for service of the papers by either the sheriff or a process server.  By avoiding service, and making delivery difficult, it only puts off the inevitable. 

In collaborative divorce cases, where the parties are trying to be amicable and civil, the respondent spouse can avoid service of process by “agreeing” to sign a waiver of service.  This is  an acknowledgment of “accepting” the papers by mail or hand delivery by the spouse after the waiver” document is executed.  It is simply a “nicer” way to get divorced.  One other nice alternative is to have the respondent attorney accept service of divorce papers on behalf of the client. 

Without service or waiver, if a spouse cannot be located, the only other way to proceed to divorce court is to file an affidavit of diligent search, and publish the announcement of the divorce suit in the legal newspaper.

For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091, or click on the Firm’s web site at

When Do I Tell My Spouse I Want A Divorce?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire – West Palm Beach, Florida

I often get this question at the initial consultation with a client.  My answer does not depend upon whether the client believes the case will settle or go to trial.  My answer depends upon the circumstances of the marriage and current relationship of the parties.

1.   If the parties are still living under the same roof:  

I advise my client to not say a word about divorce until he or she can photocopy as much evidence of the marriage as possible.  This includes bank statements, credit card statements, tax returns, mortgages, deeds, loan applications, loan documents, promissory notes, car titles,  income statements, pay stubs, health insurance policies, life insurance policies, medical bills, brokerage accounts, and any other documents to prove lifestyle of the marriage.  Only after the client has set up in this manner would I advise a client to discuss divorce with a spouse.   If the situation is amicable, that is, BOTH parties know the marriage has failed and just want to get on with life, then the discussion should be about a COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE.  If, on the other hand, one party is hurt and angry, a spouse should protect himself or herself from a situation conducive to domestic violence.  See a lawyer and get the divorce papers filed as soon as possible.

2.  If the parties are already living separate and apart:

The husband and wife know that divorce is coming and that it is just a matter of time.  In situations such as these, I advise clients to have us file the divorce papers and simply serve the other spouse without any tip offs.  If a client has a conscience, and wishes to tell the other spouse “you will be served”, oftentimes the receiving spouse avoids service of process of the divorce papers just for spite.  Without service of process, or an opposing lawyer accepting service, there can be no divorce. 

A very important point to remember is that the filing date of the divorce papers is often used as a cut off date for marital assets and debts.  Once the papers are filed in the courthouse, each party is responsible for himself or herself.  Until then, you are married, and may share the marital debt.

For more information, see our Firm’s web site at or call Robin Roshkind, P.A. at 561-835-9091 for a consultation with one of our attorneys.  The Firm services husbands and wives of Palm Beach County, Florida.