Is Your Marriage BROKEN?

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You can’t blame him for seeking out his old flame on facebook.  You can’t blame her for reconnecting with her college sweetheart.  You can’t blame a husband OR a wife for having a hot and steamy adulterous affair…at least not in the State of Florida, since Florida, legally speaking, is a no fault state.  What you can do is: 1) realize the marriage is broken;  2) live with it;  3)  fix it; or 4) divorce and move on. 

Infidelity takes many forms:  sexual, emotional, and financial.  Or any combination thereof.  What kind of infidelity are you sleeping with?  Whatever the case, only you can decide if it is worth trying to fix.  Even the best intentions are thwarted, sometimes when he won’t give her up…she won’t stop spending…they are room mates of convenience. 

If communication won’t break the ice resulting in fruitful discussions, maybe then marriage counseling will help.  You both have to want to go.  If that is not possible, or you tried and it isn’t working, then be smart about your bad fortune and seek legal advice before you lose the chance to protect yourself from the inevitable.  A break in the marriage may seem like the end, but in reality, it is just the beginning of a long a stressful process called divorce.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information. 

 

What Are The Two Types Of Divorces?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

As a divorce lawyer, I see two types of divorces out there…the legal one and the emotional one.  Often we divorce lawyers get the legal divorce resolved for our clients, but the now former wife and former husband fail to get an emotional divorce.

This often happens when there is a co dependency relationship.  Even though the former husband and former wife have moved on, legally speaking, there is still the anger, resentment, frustration and the intent to get even.  This can cause ongoing litigation in terms of modifications of alimony and child support, disputes over the kids clothing, costs, and time sharing, and contempt of court for not doing what the court order states just to be difficult.

That is why I often suggest my clients seek counseling.  It is a good idea to have professional help to get you to make the decision to divorce; to assist you with getting through the divorce process, and ultimately to achieve that all important emotional divorce so you can move on with your life.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com for more information. 

Sex With Your Ex?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

The shrinks always tell us that what attracted the two of you to each other in the first place, is the very thing you can’t stand about each other at the end of the marriage…EXCEPT SEX.  Sometimes couples fall back into the sex trap, causing conflicting feelings, derailing divorce proceedings that should be progressing, and mixing up the kids.

Sex with your ex is an all around bad idea.  It has been used as a power play, or ploy is a better word, to gain advantage in divorce court.  It has been used as a convenience, a familiar site, or worse, for abuse and control upon the other person.

If you are thinking about having sex with your ex while in divorce proceedings, seek professional help through  marriage counseling or psychotherapy.  Or if your spouse or former spouse “just makes it happen” in the lust of the moment, at least be aware that you are being used.  Stay away from denial.  Remember the sun will shine again tomorrow.  For more information about this or other hot divorce topics, call one of the lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

Do You Have A Spiteful, Vindictive Spouse???

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You are going through a divorce.  You are the one who wants out.  You have a spouse who it hurt, and as a result is spiteful and vindictive.  You want to settle the divorce issues and move on, but he/she is more interested in getting even.  What to do?

I face this question nearly every day in the 13 years I have been a divorce lawyer in Palm Beach County.   You have few options:

1.  Get into marriage counseling or therapy together immediately.

2.  Offer much more than his/her share of the marital estate to get the deal done.

3.  Meet any other demands, such as relocation, giving the marital home, or other “unfair” requirements just to move on.

4.  Stay and fight it out in court.  A judge will see the emotion at trial and will simply follow the law.

With spiteful, vindictive spouses, chances are there will be domestic violence or destruction of personal property.  Be sure to protect yourself from both situations.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.

What If You Want To Reconcile During Divorce?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

If you are in divorce proceedings, and you want to reconcile, or you change your mind, in order to stop the process, your spouse has to be on the same page as you are.  If you filed a petition for dissolution, you can do a voluntary dismissal.  However, if your spouse has filed an answer and a counter petition, he/she also has to do a voluntary dismissal to stop the divorce proceedings in court.

Reconciliation is possible at any step in the process.  Let’s say you have already signed a marital settlement agreement.  The agreement is valid, the rights and obligations need to be adhered to, but a divorce does not have to be sought.  Just divide up the property and debts, and continue with the marriage.  Or modify the agreement to something else, given your new situation.

The point is, that in reconciliation, it has to be done by both of you.  If one person wants to continue through to divorce, reconciliation is not possible.  Counseling and therapy are good ways to ascertain whether you and your spouse are in agreement concerning reconciliation.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

What Type Of Divorce Will You Have? Part 2 Settlement or Trial

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

If you are thinking about getting a divorce in Palm Beach County, Florida, know that your divorce can go only one of two ways.  Either you and your spouse will settle your divorce issues, (including alimony, attorneys fees, child support, if any, child time sharing, equitable distribution of assets and debts, non marital property, name changes,) or  you will take all or some of the disputed issues to the judge.

Settlement is quicker, less expensive and less stressful.  But it can only happen if both parties want to settle.  If one spouse wants to settle but the other does not, you are going to trial.  Going to trial entails extensive discovery, depositions, witness preparation, transcripts, document production and analysis by a forensic CPA, court reporters, evidence and logs, and costs a bundle.   It also takes up a great deal of time and could cause illness from the stress of it all.

Counseling and therapy more than lawyering can help husbands and wives decide how to proceed.  Parties who can set aside emotion and just get the job done have a better chance of settlement.  Also judges would rather the spouses manage their own future lives.  They do not like to micro manage families. 

If you are thinking about getting a divorce in Palm Beach County, Florida, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

Remarrying Your X!

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You suffered through some unhappy years of marriage…you’ve been to marriage counseling, and therapy on your own…you’ve survived your divorce and lived as a single or  a single parent…now you want to reconcile with your ex and your ex spouse agrees.

Some might say that that is a stupid thing to do, but in my practice of more than 12 years, I have seen it 5 times! With marital settlement agreements in place from the divorce, and all property and debts divided, it is starting over.

The terms of divorce stay in place.  What may be a new experience is the prenuptial agreement you should have with your now ex spouse JUST IN CASE it happens again.  Don’t remarry without one.  It gives both of you some certainty and an insurance policy of sorts. 

People grow through experiences.  Sometimes you realize what you had and what you lost.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information.