Is Your Marriage BROKEN?

Is Your Marriage BROKEN?.

Lies Husbands and Wives Tell

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

It’s no secret that spouses keep secrets from each other.  Some are more severe than others and many involve extramarital affairs.  However, there are lies that are told, that can literally cause a divorce.  Here are some of them:

1.  Lying about a gambling problem or spending money on drugs.

2.  Lying about trust fund checks, secret bank accounts or other income.

3.  Lying about being fired from work.

4.  Lying about past debts like unpaid credit card bills or student loans.

5.  Lying about getting a big bonus or raise.

6.  Lying about supporting a former spouse or former girl friend or boyfriend.

7.  Lying about having kids from another relationship.

8.  Lying about paying household expenses when they are in fact not paid.

9.  Lying about lottery winnings, and online or TV shopping addictions.

These lies break the trust between a husband and wife.  They also cause real problems with bill paying, and wreak havoc on family finances.  If you are the victim, you may be better off single.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 8335 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

Married To A Cheater? Here’s Why…

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

There are as many reasons to get married as to stay married.  But if you are married to a cheater, and you know it, and can prove it, here is why you stay:

1.  You are afraid.  You are afraid to upset the apple cart.  You don’t know what will happen if you blow the whistle and confront your spouse with your knowledge of the truth. You don’t know what the reaction will be.  You don’t know if he/she is in love, or if this is just a passing affair.  And, you are afraid to find out.

2.  You are in denial.  You don’t want to admit to yourself that your husband/wife is cheating on you.  You will feel like a failure; you will feel inadequate. Worst of all, you will feel like it is all your fault.  So you would rather pretend to yourself that the affair does not exist.

3.  You have hope.  You think if you stay long enough, hang in there and look the other way, the affair will just burn itself out and he/she will return to the marriage as if it all never happened.  You have too much hope.  You are being unrealistic and fooling yourself.

4.  You are too proud.  You can’t admit to yourself or others that this could happen to you.

5.  You are stuck.  Stuck in a rut and don’t want change.  Change takes guts, effort and affirmative action.  We all hate change.

6.  You think you deserve pain.  Pain can be either physical or emotional or both. A professional therapist or mental health counselor can help you examine why you think you deserve pain in your life.

Until you have had enough, you will stay and exercise your right to any or all of the above. When you have had enough, you will consult a divorce lawyer about your rights and protection.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com for more information.

Why Affairs Don’t Matter In Palm Beach Divorces

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

“He/she has been cheating on me!  This divorce is all his/her fault!”  Those are words that may be spoken in divorce court, but they will have no legal significance and the judge will probably tune it out UNLESS the testimony or evidence can prove there were substantial marital funds expended on the paramour.

Florida is a “no fault” state.  The spouse who is “wronged” does not get to punish the wrongdoer in the legal scheme of things because there is a big difference between moral wrongs and legal ones.  The court is not going to decide who was right and who was wrong.  The court is not going to entertain the reasons for the parties split.  The court is not going to micro manage your lives. 

Where there are cases dissipation of marital assets, due to drugs, gambling, affairs, the court MAY give the wronged spouse additional funds to make up for the misery.  This legal principle is called dissipation of marital assets by one spouse to support his sex, drugs, shopping or other addiction.  But remember, you the innocent spouse, married this person, and stayed married all those years.  It is something to think about.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.

 

The Many Faces of Cheaters

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

You caught your husband/wife cheating.  Now what?  You have two options.  Leave or stay.I hate to boil it down to such a simplistic statement because I recognize the frustration, confrontation, anger, disappointment, hurt, fear and even sometimes violence that results. The emotions of being betrayed are intense and heart wrenching.  What follows discovery of the cheating is either an admission of guilt or denial of same; then there is the blame game.  Or making light of a serious situation. Or remorse and apologies followed by useless promises.  No matter how you look at it, cheating causes marital trouble.

But here’s the big punch:  I am not just talking about cheating as being extra marital sex, adultery, affairs, or romances.  In addition to sex cheating, I am also talking about financial cheating; food cheating; chores cheating; gambling cheating; emotional cheating; alcohol or drugs cheating.  Think about it for a minute.  Some marriages have more than one!

These many faces of cheating can have serious and disastrous effects on a marriage.  Things like financial ruin,broken trust, abandonment, domestic violence.

If you find yourself to be the victim of a cheater, like I said before, you can either leave or stay.  If you stay, hope for change.  If you leave, your life is then under your control.

For more information about divorce in Palm Beach County, call one of the divorce lawyers at Robin Roshkind, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb.com.

Can A Cheating Spouse Be Punished By Florida Divorce Courts?

by Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

Sitting in my office, listening to potential divorce clients, it seems like no one is having sex within their marriage.  They are either sex deprived, or they or their spouse are cheating on the side.

To some extent, the Florida law protects cheaters, directing the “cheated upon” spouse to simply divorce the cheater.   That’s what is meant when we divorce lawyers say Florida is a “no fault” state.    However, the law does protect an innocent spouse from dissipation of marital assets.   What that means is if a cheater is spending significant sums of marital monies on the affair, that so called dissipation of marital assets can be considered in the financial scheme of the divorce.  There may be an unequal equitable distribution given in favor of the innocent spouse by the divorce court judge.

Case law defines significant sums as: buying a girl friend an expensive car, paying her rent, buying a condo for the paramour, taking numerous expensive vacations or shopping trips, all the usual but expensive trappings of keeping a lover.   A casual dinner out does not qualify.

If you suspect your spouse is the cheating kind, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561 835 9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at http://www.familylawwpb for more information.  We may want to put a private eye on your spouse and use that testimony and evidence in court to get you the better part of the marital estate.

Common Mistakes About Divorce In Florida.

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

Many people who are going through a divorce for the first time,  do not understand Florida law.   I get questions like the following:

1.  REGARDING JEWELRY: husbands and wives think that because a piece of jewelry is a gift given during the marriage,  the jewelry belongs exclusively to them.  Not true… it is marital.  This can make a big difference if the jewelry is substantial.

2.  REGARDING PUNISHMENT:  couples often think that the one who files for divorce, or the one who leaves the marriage,  is the one who will be “punished” by the court in terms of receiving less assets from the marriage.  Not true, because Florida is a no fault state.

3.  REGARDING ADULTERY:  same premise as above.  If your husband or wife is cheating on you, the only recourse you have is to divorce the cheater.

4.  REGARDING MOVING OUT OF THE MARITAL HOME:  Floridians do not lose their property rights by “abandoning” the marital home.  If you have sweat equity in the house, or your name is on the deed, or have any other marital interest, you have an entitlement to your property whether or not you live there.

5.  REGARDING NAME CHANGES: if you want your name restored, you should do it now during the divorce proceedings.  If you wait, you will have to pay another filing fee for a new case in the courthouse.

6.  REGARDING YOUR SPOUSE SUPPORTING YOU:  you don’t have to get a divorce to get your spouse to support you.  If you have the need and your spouse has the ability to pay, you can get support without divorce.

7.  REGARDING CHILD SUPPORT:  the statutory child support guidelines have not changed in a generation.  The Florida legislature really needs to address this.

8.  REGARDING RESIDENCY: you have to be a Florida resident for at least 6 months prior to filing for divorce.  That means having your “stuff” in the state, having a Florida driver’s license, owning property, or having a leasehold interest here.

If you are thinking about getting a divorce in Palm Beach County, Florida, call one of the divorce lawyers at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com for more information.