Sharing children in divorce…hard to get used to.

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

One of the by products of a divorce action is the sharing of the children.  An in tact family functions very differently from a broken home. If it is hard on the adults, you can imagine how hard it is on the kids.

You have to share the children.  That means not having them for certain events, holidays, times of the day, etc.  With work schedules of parents, children sometimes have to come second.  Children become bouncing balls, going from mom’s house to dad’s.  They forget their school books, soccer shoes, homework.  They may not have adequate clothing at one place or the other.  They end up carrying their stuff from place to place. It is not easy being a child of divorced parents.

Parents fight over the kids and kids think it’s their fault.  “You didn’t return the clothes clean” is a common complaint to the other parent.  “Don’t go to the game today I’m going”, is another.  None of this is good for anyone.

Adults need to step up to the plate and be adults.  Think about what your kids are going through having to share YOU.  For more information about this or other divorce topics including modifications of court orders on children, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

The Legal Technicalities of Fighting for Custody.

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

The law on children and custody battles in the State of Florida is the best interests of the child.  What exactly does that mean when you have to present your case to the judge?

It might mean getting your child a lawyer of his/her own.  Or a guardian ad litem, a friend of the child, to testify in the courtroom for the child.  Or having a psychologist testify as an expert witness as to what is in the best interest of the child of this marriage.  Or bringing in the teachers, coaches, or school principal into court as witnesses.

Depositions and transcripts of “good mommy” or “good daddy” witnesses may be taken.  Is there always food in the house?  Do  you let your children play with these children?  Are there sleep overs and trips to the zoo?  Do these children exhibit unacceptable behavior?  There are a million questions and answers to determine which parent is the “better” parent.

To alleviate some of the litigation, the courts have taken on “time sharing” to replace “custody”.  But some parents are just unfit.  Abandonment, neglect, abuse, criminal behavior, drug use, partying til all hours, drunk driving, are just some of the issues that testimony and evidence cover in determining the best interests of the child in court.

For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

Custody Battles…who gets the kids?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

My client is a good parent…the opposing spouse is a good parent.   A divorce is forthcoming.  What is a judge to do about the children?

 The law in the State of Florida dictates that the judge does whatever, in his or her opinion, is in the best interests of the child based upon evidence and testimony at trial.  Another alternative is by agreement of the parties which becomes an agreed order.   BUT it can get complicated.  As in the case of Michael Jackson’s children, natural parents are not always in the best interests of the child.

The PRESUMPTION is that a natural parent will give the best care, but that is not always the case, again like the Michael Jackson custody battle.  Oftentimes my clients are the PARENTS of a mother or father where the other spouse can’t be found or  is unfit.  In this type of situation, the grandparents can become guardians of the child until the the one parent becomes rehabilitated and fit again or the other parent resurfaces. 

In cases where there are two unfit parents, the court will look to relatives of the child, or foster care.  In cases that are more clear, where one parent is fit and the other is unfit, the natural fit parent will get  sole custody, until such time as the other parent becomes rehabilitated and fit again.

Custody of children carries with it much responsibility.  It is the job of the judge to make sure the children are properly taken care of by appropriate adults.

For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

What makes a parent “unfit”.

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

When it comes to time sharing with children, or paternity actions where the father is finally adjudicated the father by DNA testing, the court has to determine the best interests of the child/ren.  The same holds true for cases where a parent wants to relocate and the other parent does not give permission and a court order is sought.

Allegations of “unfit parent” can arise to thwart the relationship of the “undesireable” parent.  However, “undesireable” is not the same as “unfit”. 

Under the laws of the State of Florida, BOTH child and parent have rights,  UNLESS a parent is adjudicated “unfit” in a court of law.  The case law defines “unfit” as a parent who is unable to take care of him or herself…unable to take care of the child…one who abandons, abuses or neglects a child…an alcoholic, a drug abuser, a party person til 3 am every night…you get the picture.

Parents may not agree with parenting styles or decisionmaking or even lifestyles of the other parent, but that is not enough to make a parent “unfit” in the eyes of the law.  

The way courts handle an unfit parent is to order supervised time sharing, order parenting classes, order the parent to counseling, order the parent to a psych evaluation, and to take normal rights away until the parent is rehabilitated and the child is safe with that parent. 

For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

How do we split the baby?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

There aren’t that many divorcing fathers who wish to change diapers, or go through a baby’s transition from breast milk to cereal.   But it does arise where divorcing parents have infants.  So how do you split the baby?

Here are some helpful hints:

1.  Both mom and dad have to learn about babyhood.  Pay attention to not let an infant fall off the sofa, or a two year old to get into the cabinets.

2.  Realize you both are responsible for the helpless child and must protect him from himself.  

3.  Baby proof both homes.  This is necessary!

4.  Follow doctors orders.  If the child needs special attention or medication, be a responsible parent.

5.  Have two sets of everything…two cribs, two bottles, two toys, two blankets, etc.

6.  Cooperate and coordinate with the other parent as to feeding and sleeping schedules.   Otherwise you both will be up all night if the baby does not get regular feedings.

7.  Regardless of whether you are the mom or the dad, take baby classes to learn about the care of an infant.   

Babyhood is an important time for a child to bond with both mom and dad.  So don’t work against each other because it is the baby who will suffer as a result.  For more information about this or other divorce topics, call one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

What is parental alienation syndrome and how can I stop it?

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire, West Palm Beach, Florida

Parental alienation syndrome is where one parent turns the children against the other parent.  Most divorce decrees have a “disparagement” paragraph which forbids each parent from disparaging the other to the children.

Courts recognize that children see themselves as a part of each parent and where there is denegration, it is harmful to the child because the child loses self esteem; he or she also loses respect for the disparaged parent and parenting becomes more difficult.  Judges take this bad behavior seriously and the Florida legislature has even passed a shared parenting statute which forbids disparaging behavior of one parent to the other.

Where evidence and testimony is produced showing a child is harmed by alienating behavior, courts will decide to alter the parent time sharing arrangement.  The court’s job is to protect the child and the best interests of the child.  Limiting time sharing, or requiring supervised time sharing is the response to a parent who alienates the other to the detriment of the child.

For questions about this topic or other divorce topics, call on one of the attorneys at ROBIN ROSHKIND, P.A. at 561-835-9091 or click on the Firm’s web site at www.familylawwpb.com.

New laws, new language…

By Robin Roshkind, Esquire – West Palm Beach, Florida

Leave it to the Florida Legislature to change family law statues to incorporate “equal footing” language when it comes to divorce and children’s issues.  Effective in October 2008, no longer will there be parent “visitation,” but rather the statute will put forth “time sharing.”  No longer will there be a “custodial parent” or a “primary residential parent,” but rather a “parenting plan.”  ”Non-custodial parents” will no longer exist and parents will no longer “visit” with their children.  The new laws regarding children will be less weighted in favor of one parent over the other.  The lawmakers are hoping this will result in less litigation caused by an unequal footing between parents.  It remains to be seen if this will put family lawyers out of business.

Other noteworthy changes to the laws of divorce include equitable distribution of marital assets.  It used to be you had to wait until trial for a spouse to get his or her share of the assets of a marriage.  With the new statutes, judges can order a partial distribution of marital assets to both parties so they can pay their attorneys and living expenses pending the litigation.  Also under the old statutes, gifts between spouses were seen as marital property.  Now they will be seen for what they are…gifts, and the property of the receiver. 

“Special equity” in property will no longer exist in favor of an “unequal distribution” of marital assets.  And last but not least, filing fees are going up and are being added for those who chose to file counter-petitions.  

For more information about divorces in Palm Beach County, Florida, please call my law firm, Robin Roshkind, P.A., for a consultation (561-835-9091) or visit the firm’s website at www.familylawwpb.com.